The first time that you call a person for a date can be incredibly scary. Even the follow-up to a second date can often be quite difficult. The only way to get over this fear is to be well prepared so with that in mind here are some points that you should keep in mind.
Always remember to be very well prepared:
before you make the call make sure that you know why you are calling; you want a date with them why? Where? At what time?
Create this small script so that you know what you will say when you have the other person on the phone. This might sound a little fake but it’s incredibly easy to start stuttering or to go completely blank when you get nervous so it is always a good idea to have a script of what you are going to say and even to practice it a few times before you make the call.
Make sure that you have all the information that you need. If you’re planning to take a person on a date to a particular place, make sure that you know where the place is, and any information that the other person might be interested in.
Don’t apologize for anything, don’t make excuses:
When you have the other person on the line and your talking to them, be confident and don’t apologize for bothering them or calling at a wrong time. Get straight to why you are calling and don’t linger on the line once you have your answer.
How you deliver your first line determines how successful your date call will be:
The opening lines are very important so they should be smooth and sincere. Being funny and lighthearted is good, being overconfident and sounding like a jerk/snob is bad. The best way to start a conversation on the phone is to ask if you are talking to the person that you called for and then to let them know who you are and perhaps where you met. Before you make the call take a few deep breaths and put a smile on your face; studies have shown that people can actually tell when someone speaking to them with a smile and it can positively affect the conversation.
Listen to that part of your mind that is scared:
Some people will try to tell you that you should try and ignore your fear and try to overcome it but this is actually quite counterproductive. Fear is always a friend that is telling you that you need to be more prepared or more cautious about what you are about to do. Practice your script and review what it is that you want to do with the person that you want a date with. Use that fearful energy to become more prepared and to try to come up with the best way possible to get that person to go out with you.
If you are still scared but you have done everything they can think of to prepare for your call, then be satisfied with the fact that you’ve done your best and now it’s up to the other person. Relax.
Not everyone that you call for a date will say yes:
You must be prepared for the fact that you might face rejection. Allow for the possibility that the other person might say no to you and you will find it much easier to make a difficult call. It can be a really hard thing for the ego to think that it is being rejected but dating is always a numbers game. Sometimes people aren’t prepared to go with you even though they really like you and there are times when chemistry is just a little bit off and that’s all that it takes. Appreciate the other person’s decision and be happy and honest about whatever rejection you might face; rejoice in the fact that you’re in the game having fun with people, living your life to the fullest and not hiding behind your fears.
Learn from those people that tell you no:
As I said there are times when things just aren’t right and it’s not really your fault that other people do not want to go out on a date with you. There are also times when things are just not quite right either in your delivery or how you went about meeting that other person in the first place. Whenever you can, find out honestly why the other person doesn’t want to date you and learn from this so that next time you will be able to do things just a little better and get the date with that very sexy person that you want to go out with.
Calling a person for a date can be a very difficult thing especially when it is the first time you call them. You’re putting yourself out there and rejection is possible. The best way to get over this fear is to be prepared and to think of calls like this as being a kind of game that you are playing with the other person. One more step that you take in a dance to see if you will get together and become something special.
Fear is telling you that you should be prepared but it is not telling you that you should not call. Take a chance and live a little, and if the other person says no then learn something from it and move on. Dating can be a fun ride but you first have to get on.