Self-Improvement and Interesting Knowledge

I would like to share with you an exercise that I like to call, “Happy Calisthenics”. Sometimes it is very difficult to break a sad mood or a depressive state. Anyone who has found him/herself in the throes of a large depression, knows that stopping this kind of nasty blue state can be almost impossible. Most just opt to wait it out in the hopes that if they are patient enough it will go away.

The problem is that waiting around for these depressive states can be a bad thing. Often you make the situation worse by segregating yourself. If people don’t have experience in re-focusing their minds, they tend to spend this time by themselves focusing more and more on those things that put them in a bad state to begin with. Waiting then for things to get better is not the answer.

What you really need to do is to break the depressive routine. All things in life are given strength by the power of routine. This is the constant and repetitive action, whether mental or physical, that allows any state like this to develop a type of identity. Think of it as sort of like a recording; pressing play is a particular trigger like seeing something or having someone say something; after the play button is hit the body and mind robotically go through a very specific set of actions that initiate and enforce this depression or whatever bad mood is affecting you.  In order to destroy this depression then you have to destroy the routine that perpetuates it.

A great way to break a bad routine, or any routine for that matter, is to do something that is completely different from what makes up this particular routine. Happy calisthenics do this by having you perform a physical action that you normally would not do in that situation. These calisthenics are going to make you do something weird, silly, and perhaps even funny at a time when you definitely don’t feel like being any of these things.

It also works well because as I have told you before, the bodies physiology or body language has the amazing ability to change its mental and therefore emotional state. Changing your body postures and using stances that are highly different from your depressive routine will create a type of ‘state break’ that will literally jar you out of where you are mentally and emotionally at the moment.

First get yourself in a place where you can be by yourself. Then before you engage in any thinking at all, stand up straight and tall and put your arms straight up over your head. Bring your arms down, turn your head to the left, then to the right. Now puff out your cheeks, hold it, blow the air out in a big woosh and a smoothly as you can, start doing the twist. Start singing a little ‘Cubby Checker’ (look him up and youtube how to do the twist if you don’t know what I am talking about) and really get into the twist, try some new moves. Continue to do this for a least half a minute, then transition into a modern dance and do something like, ‘the flower opening its petals to the sun’. Finnish with some ballet twirls, remember to put your arms up, good posture is key in ballet. Finally finish by standing tall and straight again and force a big crazy grin on your face. Hold that grin for half a minute, and if you can laugh like the joker a few times.

Now this might seem funny now but when you are in a horrible funk it will just seem stupid. What you think here really doesn’t matter, just do it. Afterwards you might not feel that happy but you will feel a kind of shock, like you are disoriented and aren’t quite sure what to do. It is crucial that you don’t let yourself slide back into the depression routine again. Move on out of there as fast as you can and start doing something else.

If you are suffering from a horrible depression, if you think that things are beyond hope, then I dare you to do happy calisthenics in public.  Find a nice crowded street corner and do a fine Irish jig for all to admire and enjoy, try and keep a straight face, be professional. You will be cured faster than you can imagine. Happy calisthenics break routine, destroy the ego, and cure depression, so try it. I dare you!

 

 

 

 

How positive do you feel about the things in your life? Most people tend to believe that they are very positive but they seldom take stock of their own thoughts. They figure that since they feel alright, then things must be fine. And fine for many is basically positive.

There is a big difference though between feeling fine and alright and being positive and happy. If you are pretty good at ignoring your mind or have such a busy life that you are seldom conscious of your own thoughts, you tend to figure things are alright and you leave it at that. This would actually be fine if you are able to completely shut off the internal dialogue in your head but that is not ever really the case. The mind tends to work away even when you think you are too busy to notice. Even when you do engage in a concentration intensive task, any break in the work flow gets your mind going again.

I don’t mention these things with the idea to scare you or to make it seem like you have no control over your mind. The fact is that you do and if you do find something that you can dedicate a lot of positive attention to, you can greatly reduce that internal dialogue, whether positive or negative.

What I want to point out though is that your mind and therefore your internal dialogue, is hard to stop. Also I want to point out that its hard for us to really know our mind without self examination. With this in mind I wanted to give you an exercise that you could use to help your thought pattern. This exercise should help you to realize how you feel about many different things. It’s easy and can be fun if you approach it like a game:

I want you to make a list of the top 10 things that you think most about. To do this you might need to do some self examination; trying to pay attention to your thoughts and what you are thinking about throughout the day. But it isn’t a difficult task, most of us think mostly about the following:

  1. money
  2. clothes
  3. car
  4. friends
  5. career
  6. health
  7. food
  8. pets
  9. etc.

Now that you have your list, rate each one of the items on your list seeing how positively you feel about each one. Use a scale from 1 to 10, 1 being the least positive and 10 being the most positive. To do this, take money for example and contemplate it in general and in your life specifically. How to you feel about it, rate this feeling.

Now look at your list and see how you did. Were you generally positive or negative. As long as you do this exercise honestly, you will get a real good idea of how positive or negative you are at the moment. Use this knowledge so that you can begin to better understand your internal dialogue.

Now take an item on the list that you rated as being negative about. On your list, right beside the item, write down a positive picture or thought about the item. For example if you had a low number for money, write down some thought or picture that you could hold when you think about money that would make you feel more positive. And at the bottom in quotation marks, write down an affirmation that you could use to uplift you right away.

For example you could write:
I see myself in an incredibly beautiful and opulent restaurant in Monte Carlo, being served incredible food and drink by a amazing waiter. All around me I see incredible and beautiful things. I eat the best food in the most expensive china and crystal. I am treated like royalty and I deserve the best.
“ I am rich and wealthy, money flows to me naturally and effortlessly.”

If you then use this picture anytime that you have a money thought, you will see that you will begin to feel far more positive about this item on your list. The affirmation can be used at the same time or when you don’t have time to visualize (like when you are driving).

This is a fun exercise that will teach you a lot about your internal dialogue and how positive it is. If you follow the recommendations and create a positive picture for those things that you feel more negative about, you will change your internal dialogue for the better and get more positive.

 

 

 

Have you ever noticed that kids can have a good time anywhere, they don’t need very much really. As long as you let then go and don’t try to micromanage them, they will soon be lost in some wonderful mental adventure and the smiles are soon flowing.

Wouldn’t it be great if you could do something like that yourself? To be able to see the magic and the wonder in just about anything? This is perhaps childhoods greatest strength, but as we grow we tend to lose that ability; to freely imagine and dream.

Well you can get some of this wonderful mind back. I will show you a fun method to have fun all the time. A game that you can play that will allow your mind to soar for a little while, or however long you like, so that you can take a break from the heaviness of the adult life. I’ll take it easy here though since we adults are all pretty stiff. We are no longer the little elves that seem to see crazy adventures everywhere. But we can regain some of this lost power by learning how to free our minds and let them play.

To do this fun game, you should wait until you are alone somewhere, perhaps in a nice quite place, and you are somewhat relaxed. I KNOW, this sounds like some kind of exercise already. Sorry about that but the adult in us is all too uptight right now, so you need to take it easy and go slow. In time, if you are good at this game, you can see about doing this anywhere; the bus, work (?), anytime your mind screams, “I’m bored” or “ I’m sad”.

When you are relaxed in this nice quiet place, I want you to ask yourself; “What could I do right now that would make me feel awesome?” Now your adult mind will have plenty of trouble with this simple question at first, so relax into the moment and explore your feelings. What is it that you would love to do right now? Not later, not something that you think you have to do; what crazy or fun thing would you love to do right now, for yourself? Would you like to go skydiving? Perhaps you want to sit and relax on a hot beach in the tropics? Perhaps you would like to have a sword fight with Jack Sparrow?

You decide what you want to do. And it’s super easy to know whether you picked the right thing or not; it will make you feel great. Contemplate and find that thing that would make you feel fantastic if you were doing it right now. Don’t censor yourself, this is  your mind and no one needs to know what you are imagining, give yourself free reign, you are FREE!

Now imaginatively, in your mind’s eye, pretend that you are doing that thing that will make you feel awesome. Most people will have to close their eyes and sit down on something comfortable to relax. The BIG trick here is not to force anything, just focus on your desire and then let your mind bring up fun images on its own. If you are seeing negative things then you are trying too hard and you are taking this way too seriously. A child does not care whether this is real or if it will ever be real in the adult sense. A child does not try to make it be as real as possible in his mind, he just lets it happen, and the more desire that he has, the easier that the visualization is. So just relax and remember that it’s a game, no pressure. Let your emotions guide you in your visualization. It will never be static too long, you might start in a beach but might soon find that you decided that you would rather go sailing instead and then that it would be fun to join a band of pirates and go on a great adventure.

Visualization means seeing it in your mind. It doesn’t have to be all visual though; you might feel the wind in your face, hear the seagulls, taste the rum. See if eventually, without hardly trying at all, you can use all your senses in your fun game. The trick again is not to try so hard but to just remember that this is a fun game.

You often see kids shaking their hands about, jumping around, or suddenly taking off in a flurry up the stairs. That is for the advanced practitioners. For now just take it easy and do this in a quiet relaxing atmosphere while you are sitting or relaxing somehow. Eventually you will be able to imagine all this with your eyes open; images playing like fantastic tapestries before your eyes. On a bus or a public place no one will know what you are up to, aside from the fun grin on your face. Eventually you might want to jump about and have fun like a kid. I highly recommend it! Just make sure your alone, grown-ups are really stiff and they might just send you to the funny farm.

This fun game is incredibly beneficial. It does the obvious of getting you in a better mood, but it has also the ability to truly change your being. It will increase your metabolism and create a better mental state. It will also create hope and beauty in your life. It will ‘compel’ you to a better place and a better life.

 

 

 

 

It is sometimes hard to comprehend that we are all in charge of our lives. Many of us find ourselves in difficult financial situations. This tends to put a very large strain on our emotions and our time which can be very debilitating.

You must always remember though that you can change your circumstance for the better. This involves some soul searching and much patience but you can overcome any difficult situation if you are willing to believe that you can. I will not say it is hard work to create a better life, because if it does seem like hard work, it is quite likely that you are looking in the wrong place.

I will say though that changing your life for the better requires much focus. The difference is that effort is really going against the grain while focus means concentrating on what you want and not paying attention to those things that you do not want. Many will rebel against these thoughts because we have all been taught that life is hard. We all have many well meaning relatives or friends that will tell us over and over again that in order to do anything in this life we have to work hard at it.

I know that many of us find ourselves doing jobs that are not very satisfying. It’s quite possible that you are doing a job that is very emotionally or physically difficult. Many people are also engaged in a job that is just routine and you have to do this job at the moment in order to pay the bills. These jobs have a way of taking away your energy and your spirit, but that is only the case if you let them. Believe that you can escape this lifestyle and you will.

The best way to do this is to do it a bit at a time. There is no need to quit your job and move to wherever taking a terrible chance. Actually such endeavors usually end in disaster because these moves are literally acts of escapism. You are trying to run away from your problems in the hope that somehow you will get lucky and find your lucky star. This is of course doom because you are doing something out of desperation.

You are in control and you can change your life for the better. Start by examining your beliefs about yourself right now. Many of us have very low self-esteem. We have all been told that it is not right to brag, put on airs, or become self important. Unfortunately this advice, even though it is well meaning, does not allow you to express the totality of yourself.

When you find yourself depressed, doubting your abilities and feeling really low; tell yourself that you are awesome. Believe in yourself and the power of your own being. How many times in your life(!) have you sat around for ten minutes and told yourself how great you are. We are told that we should take the time and tell our loved ones how special they are, BUT how often have you told yourself how wonderful and capable you are?

Don’t expect others to start telling you that you are great to start believing it yourself. Tell yourself now that you love yourself. “I love myself’! What an odd and frightening feeling, that you might sit around for ten minutes a day, every day and love yourself. Can you afford that love? Aren’t you supposed to give your love to others and to those that have meaning in your life?

But loving yourself is the beginning of true love for others. There is no way that you can love others if you do not love yourself. Love and respect are also not finite things that will run out if you give too much. The more you love and respect, the more you can love and respect. But start with yourself. Believe in your abilities. Believe that you are lucky enough. Believe that you are great enough to do what you want in life, that you are the captain of your life and therefore the captain of all of the circumstances that you see around you. Do this for yourself and you will help all those that you come in contact with.

Try and tell yourself this everyday:

“ I love myself. I will start slow from where I am so that I don’t fight against things. I have the right to do the things that I love because God put me on this Earth to express all of myself. I am worthy! I am worthy of a good life. I am special enough to be able to love myself. I am special and those around me are blessed to have me in their lives. I will honor myself and dedicate time for myself and to do those things that I love, and by doing so I will find my place in this world doing what I love to do!”

 

 

 

We are all the subject of changing moods. Sometimes we feel happy, other times sad, there are even times that we just feel indifferent towards everything. External circumstance also play a huge role in how we feel at any particular moment.

While I am not saying that you should feet happy all the time, if you can help it, I think that we would all rather be in a better mood. This can be difficult because generally speaking we are all so moody. Wouldn’t it be great if you had a way to get into a better mood, or at least be able to stop a nasty mood altogether so that we could begin to exercise better thoughts and feelings?

Here is a technique that you can use to change your mood very quickly. It will allow you to get over that terrible hurdle that we sometimes experience where gloom and doom just seem to overpower our very being. This is so simple that you are going to love it;

Next time that you find yourself in a mood that is not to your liking, look up!
Its that simple really. The act of looking up has an amazing effect on our physiological structure:

 

  • First it changes our posture which changes your feelings and thoughts instantly. If you are looking down then you are most likely hunched over which is a depressive body posture. By looking up you change that posture and therefore change your mood.
  • Looking up changes your focus of attention. Looking down at the ground tends to ground us and give us a feeling of being stuck where we are. The ground, depending on where you live, tends to be full of dirt and discarded things. Looking up allows you to see the sky, the sun, the clouds and the beauty of the heavens. It gives you a sense of infinite freedom and possibilities.
  • Looking up means that you have to roll your eyes up, which has the amazing ability of triggering the production of Alpha waves in the brain. These Alpha waves will relax you and break up any tenseness that you might feel.
  • Looking up puts a slight tension on your face that forces you to put on a slight Mona Lisa smile. Smiling is good. It is a powerful way to change your mood and to get you happy.

To do this properly you want to look up for a good fifteen seconds or longer. Now do be careful if you are walking down the street, that you are careful where you are walking. I don’t want you to trip on something or fall into an open manhole. The idea though is to look for a good long time in order to allow your body to trigger these wonderful physiological effects.
Afterwards you will want to try to keep looking up at regular intervals. Try to change your focus, see if you can catch yourself wanting to walk around with your head to the ground. When you do, make the conscious effort to raise your head and look up again.

It will take some training on yourself at first to remind yourself to look up but if you persist you will see that you will catch yourself more and more often. Before long you will have developed the habit of looking up on a regular basis.

Let’s recap; you will want to look up for at least fifteen seconds when you catch yourself in a bad mood. This will break the power of this mood and will instantly change your bodies physiology. This will create an instant positive trend that you will want to continue by remembering to look up more than you look down. With experience and minimal effort you will be able to condition yourself to look up most of the time. This will change your mood and make you happier.

P.S. Just remember to look down sometimes so that you know where you are walking!

 

 

 

The world can be a very negative place at times. Whether it is waiting in line or riding on a crowded bus, other people’s negative energy can be quite draining. In a big city environment, this negativity can be very difficult to escape. Any place where a large number of people congregate, there is bound to be some friction. This fiction can easily turn into a large pool of negativity that you will have to deal with.

Negative energy can be quite contagious if you are not careful. People have a tendency to mirror others and this can be your downfall. Next time that you are watching television, see if you can catch yourself matching the body language of the characters that you are looking at. We are constantly, and quite unconsciously, matching the body language of the people round us. And body language is an incredibly potent way to change and create emotions. If you don’t believe me, try walking around hunched over with a frown on your face all day, or try the opposite; hold your head high and try and keep a big smile on your face. This revelation might be very startling to you.

It is also difficult to deny that some places just reek of negative energy. We have all walked into a situation or a place that just seems to ooze bad energy. These places usually make you want to high tail it out of there as soon as possible. How we pick up on this bad energy, whether it is consciously or subconsciously, is not the subject of this article, but what is relevant here is that we do pick up on this energy and it does affect us.

In order to combat this negative energy and find a modicum of peace, I want to share with you a couple of techniques that I hope will help you to cope with and eventually stop all negative influence. Next time that you find yourself in a negative situation, one that you can’t escape from, I want you to do the following:

•    I want you to remove yourself mentally from the situation as much as possible. Remove every connection that you have invested in your present circumstance. If you like, you can imagine that you have just stepped into a very pleasant little room that has shut you off from everything and everyone that is outside of you. Detach yourself as much as possible from the chaos around you and concentrate on the fact that you are in this comforting room.

Feel the silence in this space and become one with it. Breathe in the silence and comfort. This is you in a relaxed state. Remember this feeling.  When you open your eyes, try and remember your comfort place. Relive the relaxation that you just felt.

•    Relax your body. When you find yourself in any kind of negative situation or environment, try to relax your body as much as possible. A completely relaxed body cannot pick up or emit emotion. Emotion creates tension; if you have no body tension then you are emotion free.

This is probably the most powerful way to fight off negative energy. The instant that you feel a tension in your body, because of a negative emotion; take a deep breath, release that breath in a nice soothing sigh, and relax your body completely. Also when you know that you will be going into a negative area, relax yourself as much as possible before you get there, and you will find that it will be much easier for you to stay positive.

Learn to monitor your body during these times. At the first sign of tension build up, consciously will yourself to relax. If your shoulder begins to tighten, then consciously will that shoulder to relax. If you get good at this then you will find that you won’t have to worry about external negativity anymore.

 

Want to know how to get yourself into a good mood?

Be Grateful.

There is nothing that will get you feeling better than to practice being grateful for all of the things that you have and for all for all the things that others have given to you. All you have to do is to contemplate for a few minutes all of the wonderful things that are yours right now. Think about all of the things that you have received on any one day;
Perhaps it’s a smile from a person that you had never met, or something that you bought for yourself or maybe even money that you received. I personally give thanks anytime that I see the sun shining since this will always cheer me up.

Taking the time to thank a friend with sincerity, believe me this will give you great joy. Appreciating those around you by giving thanks either internally or externally can have a wonderful effect on the world. Giving thanks raises your energy level and makes you smile. As you smile, those around you are affected by your mood and begin to smile as well.  Your words of gratitude encourage those around you to also appreciate what they have, which then allows them to increase their energy and feel joy.

A wonderful exercise is to take the time each day to write a list of all of the things that you have to be thankful for. When the list is done, take the time to write down or to verbally give thanks to the world and to all those that helped you throughout this day.

Thank you for reading my silly mental meanderings. You inspire me to write and to better myself and the more that I write, the more that I learn about myself.

If I were to give my very best friend a present, what would it be? Certainly money is high on the list but I am not a rich man and I doubt that lint from my change pocket would fool anyone.

If I were to give my dear friend the greatest gift that I could think of, then I would give him the gift of peace of mind and freedom. To me these things are worth more than money because money doesn’t necessarily provide these things. Money can also be fickle; here today gone tomorrow.

But what if I had a way to give peace of mind and freedom in a different way, doing a simple exercise that could be done by almost anyone and almost anywhere. Well that’s a present that I like and a present that I can give.

Please don’t think of me as being self centered and lost in my own feeling of grandeur. I truly wish to give this gift to you with a feeling of friendship and love. I don’t expect anything in return except a positive comment or two and the hope that it helps you as much as it has helped me. I would not be over exaggerating when I say that this technique has helped to keep me sane.

I must admit though that I will get large helping of personal gratification if this gift is to your liking. I give because it makes me feel good. I make no apologies for that.

The gift is a very simple one and it seems rather simplistic at first, but is has certain variables that give it great power.

My gift is this; I want to teach you how to take a walk, a simple walk that will help to ease all of that clutter in your head and help you to realize that freedom is just a matter of perspective. Or a better way to say it would be to say that freedom is really a matter of focus.

Find a nice quiet place where you can go for a nice long walk. Ideally the place for your walk would have a lot of nature and it is a quite peaceful area. Not everyone has access to this type of ideal walking area so if this is not possible for you, then a walk around your neighborhood will do.
Begin your walk and as you walk I want you to just begin to relax. All of the calamities of the day will naturally start to flood your mind and before long you will find that you have been thinking about a future deed that needs to be done or about a past experience that has become embedded in your mind.
So here is where the fun variable comes in; I want you to try with all your might to stay focused on your present moment. I want you to let go of the past and I want you to stop worrying about the future. I want you to begin to notice all of the things around you. I want you to look at the light from the sun and the shape of the clouds. I want you to pay attention to the noise around you. Weather it is a pleasant noise or not, I want you to focus only on the things right before you, right now.

If your thoughts wonder and you find yourself thinking about past or future events, I want you to strongly refocus your attention on the present moment. Walk and walk, taking one step after the other, concentrating only on the things that are before you.

After a while and when you find that you are getting pretty good and used to the idea that the only thing the exists right now is what is before you, I want you to also realize that you are only the you that is right here, right now.

If you do not look back in time or for that matter forward into what you have to do, you just become that which is here at the moment. The person that is here/now has no family, no friends, no responsibilities, no needs aside from taking one step after another.

All that you have and all that you are is right here, right now. If you must, I want you to pretend that you have amnesia and you do not remember who you are or where you come from. I want you to trick yourself then into believing that you are here alone and that the only thing that you really know is that you must be here and you must walk.

The best thing to do though is to just concentrate on the present moment and to forget about everything and everyone else.

Perhaps you think that this is a bad thing because you should not forget your children and your loved ones but believe me that when you help yourself in this way and you take the time to do this exercise, you are helping them. This exercise will rejuvenate you and it will allow you to find the peace that you need so that when you get back to “reality”, you will have the strength to carry on.
So please take the time, sometime this week and go for a walk and listen to the world around you. Use this gift to find freedom in your life.