Someone once told me that we do not choose our friends but that the universe chooses them for us. I found this statement to be very intriguing and the more that I thought about it the more that I realized that this is only the case on the surface but that there is far more going on in a spiritual level. I think that while the universe does indeed seem to choose our friends, we are actually the ones that choose them. We choose them by how we relate to the universe; this is done through our beliefs, thoughts, and actions.
My amendment indicates my belief that we are not living powerless lives, but that we actually choose and then wait to receive from the world at large. Since I do believe that we have the power to choose our reality, I also believe that we have the power to choose our friends.
Friends can be our greatest resource or they can be our greatest hindrance. If we are surrounded by supposed friends that treat us terribly and bring down our energy, then our lives suffer. On the other hand if we are surrounded by friends that uplift our spirits, encourage us, and give us energy; we are bound to do very well in everything that we do. I believe therefore that it is very important that we choose the correct friends because it is through their help that we shall either fail or succeed in most of our endeavors.
I suggest that you take the time to examine all your friendships. You should look at all the relations that you have and examine how they make you feel. A good way to do this is to find a quiet environment and to imaginatively visualize your friend in question before you. As you imagine your friend before you, how do you feel? Do you have sudden visions of past interactions? Were these good or bad times?
You should do this with all the friends that you have and deeply examine your feelings. If you do have friends in your life that make you feel drained or upset, then you must honestly question this relationship. It can be a very difficult thing but there are times when you need to distance yourself from people that bring you down. Truthful examination of your relationships will let you know, through your feelings, what these relationships are doing to you and your life. Any individual that is taking away more than he’s getting back, must be sent packing. This might sound harsh but this is your life and if you only get one chance around, it is better spent with those that truly care about you.
This exercise might really cut down on the amount of friends that you do have, but the benefits of letting go of the negative people in your life is well worth the effort. Now by negative I do not mean strictly negative, and that you should get rid of friends just because they speak negative things all the time. Some of the best friends that I have had have been these great negative types that have made me laugh for hours at a time. Comedy after all is negativity with a twist. The kind of negative friendships that I am talking about are those that are actually causing destruction in your life. You can identify these negative friendships because they do not make you happy or tell you great jokes but because they make you feel drained and powerless. You must look within yourself and question the feelings that you are having in those relationships because you are the only person that can make those very important subjective decisions.
Learn to be strong and let go of bad friendships. Being alone is not a bad thing as it is a wonderful time to grow as an individual and to discover your inner life. Be strong enough to only maintain those relationships that bring you joy and happiness, those relationships that uplift your spirit and make you feel like you could do anything. We have all had friends that make us feel this way and they are worth their weight in gold.