Persuasion is really one of the great human skills. Sometimes the word persuasion can make this art seem negative or underhanded. The reality of the situation though is that persuasion is really the art of great articulation. Seen this way, persuasion, can then be seen for what it really is and for what it should always ultimately become, which is the ability to articulate and to be able to make yourself understood.
You can find many books on persuasion. There are many techniques that are expounded but all sorts of different individuals and they all tend to follow a certain pattern of beliefs as to how human interaction works best. In this article I would like to explain persuasion as fine articulation and show you how you can have incredible persuasive power without any of the neat tricks and sometimes underhanded techniques that are expounded lately.
If you are able to articulate your thoughts perfectly and you are able to give logical conclusions and options to any objections then persuasion becomes a natural result of impeccable communication. In order to begin to develop this kind of art, you must be able to train yourself to stay objective. While emotions can be great help in communicating and understanding, they can also become a great hindrance if they are not handled properly. In order to handle these emotions properly and to have the kind of objectivity that you need, you need to develop a detached feeling. To do this I have suggested in the past and I will suggest again that you try to see things in a third person perspective. What I mean by this is that you must be able to see things and the situation that you are in from a broad perspective, a great way to achieve this is to playfully imagine that you are looking down upon yourself and the situation at hand. In this way you sort of become like a puppet master that controls the actions of your body below you and as such can stay objective enough to see everything clearly; feeling your emotions and completely engaged in the situation but at the same time distanced enough from it to control yourself effectively.
Once you can achieve this kind of objective distance, you must begin to use your logical mind. To think logically means that you always consider the end result or goal of your interaction. The logical mind asks itself firstly, “What is the ultimate conclusion that I want to achieve from the situation?” What do you need to do in order to get what you want? What do you need the other person to do to get what you want? What is the best way for you to act? What is the best thing for you to say in order to get what you want? What confrontations might you face? What objections might you face? How can you counter these objections?
These are logical questions that you must ask yourself before you engage in any situation. Moreover these are questions that you must answer for yourself before you engage in any communication. In this way you know what to say, when to say it, and how to say it best. The trick is not to be aggressive or confrontational but to keep a logical and calm mind.
Once you know what you need to say, you must be able to articulate perfectly. This means that you must be able to speak in a very concise and straightforward manner. If you can, and have the time, you should practice or at least write down what you are going to say in the most articulate way possible. In a fashion it’s sort of like practicing a speech where you try to correct your grammar and leave out any inadequate thoughts and ideas. You want to streamline your conversation and make it as perfect as possible and to the point.
Once you have all of this material at hand, you can engage in communication with the other person. This might seem like a lot of work but it gets a lot easier if you continue to do this kind of thing all the time. There is a point where you get so good at it that you do not need to write down anything and you can get yourself ready for any situation very quickly.
Once you are communicating with someone remember to stay detached. Another thing to remember is to always have a strong gaze; now this does not mean that you’re trying to stare someone down but that you are looking at someone in a calm and unemotional manner. This kind of gaze is most effective if you do as little blinking as possible, if you want more information on the power of his gaze I recommend you read the article, The Power of the Eye to Persuade.
Calm and patient, with perfect articulation, you can persuade anyone to do what you desire. Remember to not take an aggressive stance because this only introduces emotions where you want to maintain a calm and a relaxed demeanor. If the other person does lose his or her emotional stability, do not lose yours. Maintain your strong gaze and your perfect logical articulation and you will eventually get your way. Like anything else this technique requires personal practice and a little tweaking on your own. In other words learn to make adjustments to suit your personality and never consider anything as a final unalterable point. You can persuade others to your way of thinking through logic and perfect articulation.